Sunday, January 24, 2010

The Glass Slipper

There is the greek folklore that says every Human was created with 4arms, 4legs,4ears, 4eyes,2noses etc. But Zues fearing their power split them into two and seperated them from their other halves by banishing one. So each human being spent their life searching and longing for their other half.This is a myth but the underlying concept seems true, that every human beings yearns for that "other half"; that person that can complete them.

Women are ready from the time they hit their teens and their bodies start indicating the need for a man, they know that that man must come in the form of a mate/boyfriend/spouse/husband/. They are ready mentally for that commitment. But men are a different case entirely, we mature slower mentally and we get the same indicators from our bodies,but we interprete it as the need for sex and later on companionship. A mate yes, a girlfriend maybe, if said girl "plays her cards right", but definitely not a spouse or wife, because at this stage we aren't "ready".
In most men, from teenage years to the twenties, this is a period of exploration, summarized by the line "so many girls..so little time", most men in this stage fear commitment more than AIDS..lol,its that serious.But the time comes in a mans life when something changes mentally and he realizes he's ready.This realisation may be triggered by that fact that "all his friends are getting married"(peer pressure) or that "he's not getting any younger", or Love; as it dawns on him that he's found his other half and as most men will say "what am I looking for again".Which brings me to the topic of this piece, "the glass slipper".

Most of us are familiar with the tale of cinderella and how the prince searched the whole land till he found the princess whose foot fit into the glass slipper and thus he was reunited with his love.Every man has a glass slipper, this phrase "glass slipper" is a metaphor for the peculiar traits a man desires in a mate. These include physical attributes as well as mental,spiritual etc. It is the sum of everything a particular man looks for in a woman.There is a saying that states that a father is the daughters first husband and the son's first hero, so likewise the mother is the sons first wife. Initially men are attracted to women that remind them of their mom; consciously or sub-consciously. It may not be limited to physical qualities,it could be just one attribute that captivates them. So the first glass slipper is molded around their mothers foot, so to speak. But as they experience more and find out more about themselves and women in general, and with added input from their peers they begin to adjust and modify their mental glass slipper until they arrive at a stable model for their "dream girl".Allow me to digress a little, It is ironic that men who are usually impulsive and carefree in many other things are very logical and careful in choosing a spouse, while women who are usually logical and careful in normal duties are illogical and impulsive when it comes to selecting a man. A woman might know a man is a criminal but if he manages to get into her feelings she is willing to defend him and make excuses for him to whoever cares to listen. I guess that's why they say, God made woman beautiful so that Man might Love Her, and made Woman Foolish so that She might Love Him.Back to the issue at hand, most men have a mental collection of traits and attributes which they desire in a potential spouse (a glass slipper) that guides them even in selecting women to date, that's why you hear men saying stuff like "she's not my type" etc. Of all the attributes, even though it probably is the one that's mentioned first, physical attributes are the least important. Physical attributes may attract a man but it is the way the woman loves him and the way she relates to him, her personality and deeper things that make him stay. In all stories concerning the glass slipper, the view we see is just the outside. But every person who has owned a pair of shoes knows that how it fits inside is the most important.Every man wants a woman who treats him the way she wants to be treated,who doesn't ask but gives, who appreciates compliments but doesn't need them to make her feel good about herself, who has goals and let's her actions speak louder than her words, who sees him not as he is but as he could be and motivates him to be all he can be..and if he tries you on his heart and its a perfect fit? then happily ever after could be a page away.

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